dear freshman 15,

we're planning on losing you, not gaining you.  thanks a bunch.
-erin

dear self,
remember to work out whenever you can and to make healthy food (maybe even convince someone to buy you the Ninja for spinach smoothies everyday) so that you can prove yourself to all those people who think that being on your own isn't going to help you be healthy and smart.  "I told you so" is right on the tip of their tongues.
love, erin

dear world,
i like being independent.  i don't always like to ask for help, but if i really need it, or even want it, i'll ask.  so please, let me.  also, i'm sorry i'm in a bad mood.  i wish you knew.
-erin

dear humans,
the reason you didn't know those things is because you don't communicate with me either.  i know i look like i have this all down, but sometimes it's hard, and sometimes it's not my fault.  thank you.
love, erin
p.s. when i tell you how i feel, i'm not fishing for compliments.  you asked, and i'm just letting you know that's how i feel.


Dear BYU,
I would really appreciate it if you would let me know if I'm accepted or not.  I'm tempted to go to Utah State just because they let me know first, and now they're bugging me to get housing and a student id and things.  I know you want me, just please tell me.
Sincerely, Erin

dear immune system,
i know you're working overtime, but this cold has got to go.
if you fight hard, i'll take my vitamins.
thank you.
love, erin

dear hair,
DO SOMETHING.

dear room, homework, and important papers,
take care of yourself.
or else.


                    via

kinyarwanda:

1. official language of Rwanda.
2. the most beautiful movie about the Rwandan Genocide


KINYARWANDA Extended Trailer from Alrick Brown on Vimeo.


I had the opportunity to attend the second screening of this movie at the Rose Wagner theater in SLC at our school's annual NHS trip to Sundance.

It's gorgeous.  The cinematography is incredible and it's just a fantastic project.  I'm writing a newspaper article so I don't want to share all of my pictures and special quotes yet, but I'll link to the article after and share the extras with you.

We were able to have a Q & A session with the director, executive producer (who is a survivor), the cinematographer, and one of the actresses.  These people are amazing.  And I got a movie poster.  Score.

Seriously though, search high and low if you have to, but you have to see this movie.

Also, I've never seen Hotel Rwanda, but Alrick made the comment that this is about "life."  So, don't be scared.

the new MJ

I have the coolest brother ever.

I can say this because I only have one,

but if I had another, he'd have to be seriously awesome to be as cool as Mike.

Occasionally, my brother and his darling family come to Utah to visit (which I love love love) and when he came this summer, he got me hooked on Mason Jennings.

My cousin Megan is fantastic, just like her taste in music, and she pretty much idolizes my brother because he's "so cool!"  So they just talk and share music and I like to listen in.  It's adorable.

So, Mason Jennings is this dad who loves his music.  It's raw, and real, and beautiful.
Here's one I've loved since the beginning:


and one that is nice for me right now:


enjoy.

truth

I went to a wedding reception here and the bride wore this dress (which happens to be one of the bff's Christmas dresses) in Ivory with 3/4 length sleeves.  It was gorgeous!  And so classy.

I love this.

I put in my FB password wrong about 100 times this weekend.

Every time I go to they gym, like today, I remember how much I hate going when it's crowded.
Problem is, everyone has made these dang resolutions, so I just have to deal with it for a while.

One of the best movies ever sports one of the best mustaches ever.

I've never been a fan of labels (on the blaag), but I'm rethinking that.

I went to San Fran over MLK weekend to see my darling new nephew and his parents.  The new semester started when I got back so I've just been settling in, and now I'm getting some fun stuff ready, so stay tuned.

eighteen yellow roses

or like three.  Thanks, Mom:)

Every year on my birthday, after all the hype dies down, I think about the next milestone.  Recently, the big ones were 16 & 18, but now that I'm an adult, I'm comfortable.  I know this isn't where it's all at, but I'm happy with it.  I've waited a long time to catch up and I'm going to enjoy it.

I'm not going to lie, I'm ready to be done with high school, but I have a feeling this last semester will be exciting.  There are things I want to happen and things I really don't.  I'm going to work hard and hopefully everything will fall into place.

Happy Monday everyone & thank you for the birthday wishes:)

I'm bringing hankies back,

but I'm not used to carrying them around yet.  Today would have been the perfect day.


In Young Women's, our Bishop came in and told us to make sure we and all the other sisters stayed for Sacrament because we were going to have a special visitor.  I could hardly concentrate for the next hour and a half because we were all so excited.  I didn't know who it was, but I could sense the Spirit coming stronger as we drew nearer to that meeting.


My aunt was also speaking, so Maddy and I were sitting together waiting for it to start.  Someone told me who was coming, but I didn't dwell on it too much because I didn't want to be disappointed.  Suddenly the whole congregation stood.  As we peered around heads, we saw President Eyring walk into the chapel.  That's when I needed my hankie.  Maddy and I both started crying and it took a long time before that and the excitement died down enough to focus.  


My favorite thing he said was that after President Monson's call to action for more missionaries during last conference, the church really did have a surge of new missionaries.  It was so special to be so close to him because during the other talks you could see how much he was enjoying it.  He grinned and laughed, and pondered and cried.  During the intermediate hymn, I looked up and saw him crying, and then he looked at me and I started crying!  I couldn't finish the song.


Anyways, it was a really sweet experience.  :)

From 500 Days:

Summer: You always wanted to write greeting cards?

Tom: No, I don’t even want to do it now.

Summer: Well you should do something else then.

Tom: Yeah. I studied to be an architect, actually.

Summer: You did that’s cool. What happened there?

Tom: Didn’t work out. I needed a job and here we are.

Summer: You any good?

Tom: Well, um, I wrote this one.

Summer: “Today, you’re a man. Mozeltoff on your bar mitzvah.”

Tom: It’s a big seller.

Summer: I meant as an architect.

Tom: Yeah… I doubt it.

Summer: Well, you’re a, perfect adequate greeting card writer.

Tom: Thank you. That was actually my nickname in college. They called me perfectly adequate Hansen.

If anyone has connections with JGL, hook a sister up.  Can you imagine him saying, "Tomorrow you're a woman.  Congrats on being born."?  Yes, please.

Tomorrow, I'm an adult.  I don't care about technicalities.  I'm 18 and I can act civilized, so there.  

To make you happy and make you think about Mr. Gorgeous, I'll leave you this little gem on my almost birthday.

knowing me, knowing you

Knives Chau: I've never even kissed a guy before. 
Scott Pilgrim: Hey... me neither. 


I wish I knew guys this funny.


I don't have panic attacks often, but when I do, it's not fun.
We had a church activity tonight with a large group of kids. 
Most of the kids that come are younger than me.
Part of the activity required a bit of cooperation
and a bit of focus.
It was nothing that a normal person can't handle (a few pictures of the group).
I was surrounded by too many 14-15 year old boys who wouldn't calm down,
who stepped on my feet, who fell into me, and who seemed to have no respect.
And I freaked.


I'm not proud.
I definitely didn't handle it well.
I have issues when I'm a stressball.


All I could think about for the next half hour was how I only have:
one semester, five months, 148 days, and 8 more classes
until I graduate and my interactions with these children
will be extremely minimized.


Then, I came home and decided to watch Psych instead of do math so I could calm down.
It worked.
I laughed a lot and remembered that boys will be boys (but hopefully men are better).

that's life

I have a fun feature on my new computer.

It's not very good quality, but way easier & faster than before.

Because I love you all, I'm letting you see this ridiculous video 

as a preview of the silliness to come.  

You're welcome.

and don't judge.  I get excited.

whats the dill?

It's a new year!  It's happy!
If I felt like it and no one was sick of it yet, this is where I would present you with the many silly sayings the new year brings in:
"I haven't showered since last year!'
"This is the first _______ this year!"

I'll admit I did it last night when I was trying to decide whether or not I wanted Doritos to be the first thing I ate this year (I had Orange juice, p.s.) and I've thought about it since then.

Anyway, here's the good stuff.  I took a surprise New Year's trip on Thursday and just got back tonight.  Being a Florida girl, I haven't really explored these lands in the winter.  I did lots of new things this week (including snow shoeing; I love) and it was a great way to bring in this new year.

Yes, I am aware of the fact that we look awkward, high, tired, and dirty. 

Most of those are true.

I remind myself that [interruption: KSL 5 just played Home by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes and I almost peed my pants.  I love that song.  And they were talking about football.] doing new things is the best way to help me grow.  This year is going to be full of new things and I'm going to like it, dang it!

I'll be moving on to a new part of life.  I'll be starting at a new school, a BIG school.  I'll be on my own, surrounded by so many new people.  I'm not sure what this year will bring, but I'm excited to find out, and excited to share.

Because I should-- this year:
- I'm going to be more consistent in everything I do
- I'm going to work harder at school
- I'm going to cross some things off of my bucket list
- I'm going to rock.

I don't like making huge goals I can't accomplish, so you'll see more throughout the year.


Happy 1.1.11 friends!